Hey “Advertising” Department!

   I took a trip down memory lane and bought a bag of Cracker Jacks.

I was totally disappointed!

The package still clearly states that there is a “FUN PRIZE INSIDE”.

Well….. Not any more.

My “FUN PRIZE” was a little piece of paper with 1997 “sports trivia” on it about the Marlins. This isn’t “FUN”. And it certainly isn’t a “PRIZE”.

I mean really? …. Is this the best that you guys can come up with for a FUN PRIZE?

Did you even TRY?

Here’s what I pictured ….. you were so totally tapped out of ideas that someone blurted out … “Hey I know … let’s just stick this stupid thing in … call it a “FUN PRIZE” …. and just go home! Nobody will even notice!”

I don’t expect a whole lot, if anything, out of companies any more …. given the fact you are totally driven by the amount of $$$$ you can bring in with as little output as possible.

But come on … when I was a kid …. you really did get a little “FUN PRIZE” inside each Cracker Jack box.

Snapple lid facts are more fun than this!! Did you know Penguins have an organ above their eyes that converts seawater to fresh water? THAT’S fun! And you get the cool “Snap” when you open the lid! And I don’t expect a PRIZE …. because Snapple didn’t advertise it on the bottle!

Why don’t you just let the “FUN PRIZE” fade away ….. just like your imagination.



Dear “Entitled” Guy ~


Did you really think when you called and rudely yelled … damn near growling in my ear ….
Case in point: “Where are my Food Stamps?! I want to talk to someone *insert growl here* RIGHT NOW”!
Did you seriously think that I was on the other end of the phone shaking in my boots … ready to drop everything for you?
Did you really think that you just “put me in my place” because you were acting like a totally useless ass wipe?
Did you have the nerve to think that you could disrespect me and I was just going to sit there and “take it”?
Well guess what pal?
Fuck That!
That ain’t never gonna happen!
Here’s what actually happened while shit was spewing out of your mouth …
I pictured you sitting on your filthy, bed bug infested couch … clutching your free Obama phone … watching Jerry Springer blaring from your big screen TV …. drinking Big K Cola from a 2 liter bottle and smoking “no name brand” cigarettes.
And then I imagined myself snapping my fingers in your face … and watching you disappear into a cloud of your own funk.
Then *poof* …. I transferred you.
My job was done.
I wiped my hands clean of you and your “Entitlement” attitude.
So please don’t think for one minute …. you were anything to me.
Other than a miserable human being.
But you know … the sad truth is …..
You and countless others are totally dependant on a Government system …
That in fact … cares nothing about you.
You sit on your ass and wait foreverything to be handed to you.
Housing, utilities, food, transportation, medical …
The list goes on …
And when the system fails you ….
You lash out in anger and ignorance.
You have no idea how to help yourself.
You have no role models.
You’re lost.
And even sadder ….
You don’t even have a clue how pathetic you’ve become.
Here’s what I wish I could give you…
*Self Esteem


And most of all …
I wish I could transfer you to those departments.
That would be great.
Please note … for approx 2 years …. I was on Welfare, Food Stamps & WIC. My husband at the time left me and our 4 year old son to fend for ourselves.
He didn’t pay a dime of support for 9 months.
I signed up for Welfare … got a Government grant … and went back to school for 18 months.
I took computer and business classes, brushed up on my typing and office skills … landed a decent job …. and said “Thanks Government” for being there to help me.
So trust me ….. I’ve earned the right to get pissy with you “Entitled” Bastards who treat ME like I owe YOU something.
Did I use the Welfare system?
You’re damn right I did.
I used it in the way it was intended to be used ….
To help BETTER myself!
Everything I have … I’ve earned through my own Blood, Sweat and Tears.
It made me the better person I am proud to be today